eudaemonic- (adj.) producing happiness and well-being

Thursday, February 01, 2007

I have discovered just how separated I have become from the outside world and how close I am getting to my immediate world.
Two reasons for this discovery-
One of my co-workers came over to my desk, I'm guessing to kill a little time. It was probably 7 or 7:30 and I asked him why he was still at work. He has three young children at home and I told him he should go tickle all of them :O). He said "good idea" and asked me what I did after work, speaking his imaginary guess of me coming home to a "puppy or something." I told him I go for a run, talk on the phone, cook dinner, read, watch TV or make crafts, but the main thing I did was talk on the phone. Where are the people in my day? There are people on my phone and no shortage of them to talk to, but where are the bodies that hold my hand when I'm sad and pat my back when I need encouragement and laugh until their cheeks hurt?

Well, it's starting to turn out that they're at work. I had a real conversation with one of the younger reporters today. A real, true, honest, genuine conversation about faith and love, two of my favorite topics :O). We shared our true selves. We spoke of the past, present and future. If we weren't at work, we probably would have hugged, it was that nice. Now it wasn't anything out of the ordinary if you have friends, but for me, it was very special to share what the Lord has taught me and what He is teaching me right now.
Eeek, I don't have anyone to share what the Lord is teaching me? That is bad news. I've gone to church and feel God through worship there, but honestly haven't put forth much effort in making friends. Although not a good thing to feel or judge, I get the vibe that if I were to hang out with them, I would feel pressured to act like I had it all together. And HA! I don't have it all together :O) But I'm learning everyday and am truthful about it. So, I'm still searching for a genuine community where I can share myself unabashedly and where hugs are free and where there's always time for coffee with a friend.

So, as I grow ever increasingly distant from present reality, I'm growing closer with the people at work. I realize that this is both a good and bad thing in idea, but, you know, it's hard to judge what it ranks as when you're actually living it.

Hindsight is 20/20, so I know the question will be answered someday... as soon as tomorrow :O)

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